Dr. Helen Johnson
1 Dec 2022
There is a LOT of discontent in the personal development and business coaching world around people ...
There is a LOT of discontent in the personal development and business coaching world around people who talk about wealth - especially when they flaunt it.
Some argue that it is a way of inspiring people - even empowering them - by showing them what is possible and encouraging them to know their worth.
Others feel it is shallow and vain and designed to communicate superiority - in other words 'showing off'. When people are very conspicuously spending money and flashing their money, it can come off as soulless.
Relatedly, many people really do not like to talk about money. Worse still for these people would be to talk about their feelings and beliefs around money. It is too personal, they would say.
So what is going on here?
Two things I believe.
The first is that it DOES feel very exposing to talk about money - it is, after all, about the very foundations of our lives. Having any troubles in that area makes us feel very exposed. It follows that the whole topic itself is exposing.
Imagine, most of my close friends know about my dating life over the past 25 years in painstaking details. Yet there are only two people on this earth who know the contents of my bank balance and what is REALLY going on for me around that stuff. I will literally tell a stranger all my innermost thoughts and feelings but NOT my spending habits! I have a friend who is the same - she wrote a very revealing book... But money was left out of the picture.
The second thing going on here - and this, I believe is the most influential factor - is that money and shame are intimately connected. We are made very aware in society that money = status. And if you have half a brain you likely also know that money actually has very little to do with character or even talent and skill. Yet, we get judged on it. Having wealth is an easy way to score social points. OR we create a whole subculture around being anti-money, which still links money to status except the other way around…!
How much money we do or don't have feels like it has something to do with our value. It's a belief that is VERY hard to shake. Yet it's so toxic and wrong that we are desperate to be free of it. And THAT is why it can be really triggering for people.
There are plenty of people out there who understand two major things - and these are the people who DO talk about money in an empowering and joyful way - those things are:
1. Money has nothing to do with your value as a human
2. You deserve loads of money because you deserve to be really well resourced
Coz that's what money is - a really bloody great resource. A very frickin welcome resource. And just like you deserve love, support, connection, information, infrastructure, and a whole other bunch of resources, you also deserve loads of money! And that's really worth talking about...